Monday, August 10, 2009

Sociopathic leaders?

Unfortunately, not always open to public view Characteristics of a Sociopath, quoted in a now private, brave blog of survivors from a cult-like fellowship in Australia, Tales from the Crypt. By viewing a list of traits associated with sociopaths, you can get a feel for things to watch out for if your group leader or pastor seems to be leading in an abusive direction. Gives a very detailed description of how abusive people manipulate followers.

Turning Pastors to gods

When has Authority Gone Too Far? This article, from Battered Sheep, highlights the unhealthy way we've turned pastors to gods. It includes a list of 11 marks of perverted authority:
  • The claim of direct authority from God, rather than testing things by the Word
  • The command is to "submit to me," rather than "I will serve you"
  • The method of leadership is to "order" people around, rather than to appeal for them to do the right things
  • There is a dominating, "pushy" drive instead of a dependence on God to direct
  • There is a sense of control, rather than a sense of support
  • A gift is exploited so that others are made to feel dependent on it
  • There is an inflexibility--"don't question me"--"don't touch the Lord's anointed"
  • There is unapproachability and intimidation--the "aura" around the leader keeps the followers in "awe"
  • There emerges an organization built around a man and his peculiar emphases instead of around Christ and His Word
  • There will be cyclical challenges to the authority figure (which are immediately and forcefully purged)
  • There is more concern for maintaining the authoritarian structure than there is for caring about the people in it.
  • Mind Control

    Another site that shows the techniques abusers use, and compares them to mind control techniques used on prisoners of war, is this from Margaret Singer's 6 Conditions for Thought Reform listed on the web site Refocus.

    Common Characteristics of How Cults Operate

    Common Characteristics of How Cults Operate: Thoughtful list that pinpoints techniques that cults, and controlling churches, use to capture and keep followers. Here are a few: Intimidation and accusation .... For example, any questioning of authority is treated as rebellion, and not trusting. They suppress questions and conform to the group’s behavior. They Discourage Critical or Rational Thought and Questions. They will reply with comments like, "Satan is the cause of all doubt; he is keeping you from the Truth," or it will take time to understand the deep things of God. Critical thinking is discouraged being called prideful or sinful or rebellious. No independent thinking is encouraged.

    churchabuse.com

    churchabuse.com includes decent articles, especially on recovery from spiritual abuse -- as well as other resources. Article titles include Walking Away from Spiritual Abuse, Fear and Guilt: Recovering from Performance-based Relationships, Spiritual Identity Crisis? and others.

    When the pastor says, "I know your heart"

    This site sees Spiritual Abuse as a form of divination, when leaders pretend to know your mind, heart or motives. A unique angle. Never really thought of the occult angle.

    I Know Your Heart

    Does your pastor pretend he "knows your heart"? Divination, Is It Real or Fake? by churchabuse.com, shows that the little mind tricks your pastor plays on you are not much different from occultic practices. I never would have thought of these tactics as "divination" but when you look closely at what these pastors are doing, that's exactly what it is. Training you to use them as an eight-ball, more or less. A quote from the article: After being convinced that they had these powers over us, many of us gave these people control over our minds and our lives out of fear. This is one of the biggest hurdles to cross after escaping a spiritually abusive group.

    The Insidious Harm of Spiritual Abuse

    This brief and clearly organized article from Australia in pdf format called The Insidious Harm of Spiritual Abuse cuts to the heart of the matter and discusses the four "rules" of spiritual abuse: Don't trust, Don't think, Don't talk and Don't question. Graham Barker, the author, also provides several short case studies.

    Spiritual Abuse as Idolatry

    What god are you worshiping in a spiritually abusive church? That is the question Dale Ryan seeks to answer in his article: If your god is not God, fire him. Highlights:
    Let me be clear about this. The god who is quick to anger and slow to forgive is not a “distorted image of God.” It is the opposite of God. It’s the wrong god. It’s not God at all. It’s not that I was looking in the right direction but just couldn’t see clearly. I was looking in the wrong direction entirely. It was the wrong god. There is, of course, a whole pantheon of not-Gods. Take your pick:

    The angry, abusive god

    The abandoning god

    The inattentive god

    The impotent god

    The shaming god

    Use of Flattery in Spiritual Abuse

    Many abusive pastors use flattery to manipulate. This article from Wittenberg Gate explores the danger of flattery.

    Battered Sheep

    Battered Sheep Ministries: This site is a treasure trove of spiritual abuse resources. It provides links to various articles on spiritual abuse. Titles include these and many more: Abuse of Authority in the Church; The Bible and Spiritual Abuse; Is Your Church Free from Cultic Tendencies? and many other great resources.

    Clare's Blog

    This Australian site Clare's Blog: Clergy Abuse Australia, (also drawing on The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse) sums up spiritual abuse nicely for any spiritually abusive situation, in Australia or anywhere else.

    Narcissism in the Pulpit


    Narcissism in the Pulpit, includes a wealth of good information about what's behind a leader's need to control abusively. (The spooky, medieval background template behind this page is annoying as anything, but I found that cutting and pasting into a Word file is helpful, and the information is worth the trouble.) The site uses a World Health Organization definition of Narcissistic Personality Disorder: “Narcissistic Personality Disorder is a disorder in which a person has a grandiose self-importance, preoccupation with fantasies of unlimited success, a driven desire for attention and admiration, an intolerance of criticism, and disturbed self-centered interpersonal relations..."
    Authoritarian pastors may be driven by a personality disorder like this one. Knowing what to expect and how manipulation works can be quite helpful, especially for those still enmeshed in an abusive situation. Five of nine listed criteria must be met for someone to be categorized as a clinical narcissist. Among them: obsessed with fantasies of unlimited success, interpersonally exploitive, sense of entitlement, firmly convinced of own uniqueness and specialness...

    Spiritual Abuse

    Spiritual Abuse by Scott Nicloy, a Salvation Army pastor. This article explores reasons behind spiritual abuse and the sometimes unintended nature of it. It also includes something on former alcoholics who become spiritually abusive pastors, an angle I had not seen before. Nicloy talks about black and white thinking, zealotry, power hunger, perfectionism, isolationism and other signs of an abusive church.

    Characteristics of a Spiritual Abuser

    Discovered at Under Much Grace blog is this perceptive collection of abuser traits - culled from several sources - entitled Characteristics of a Spiritual Abuser. It's all fascinating stuff, but among the most interesting to me are these headings: Demystifying the guru's power (why do we assign such power to these mere men and women?) and The Authoritarian Power Dynamic

    Fringe Churches

    Voices from the Fringe is a good place to see what kinds of extremes spiritual abuse can lead to. Ron Enroth, author of Churches that Abuse (see above) writes about different techniques abusive groups use and what the result is. Enroth lists the common threads he finds in these groups:

    • An emphasis on spiritual experiences
    • An increased focus on the role of demons
    • A large proportion of members with personal, emotional, and dependency needs
    • A teaching emphasis on attitudinal sins (such as rebelliousness, lack of submission, pride, and self-centeredness)
    • An unhealthy dependence on those in authority
    • Few checks and balances
    • Minimal leadership accountability
    • A defensiveness that results in intolerance of member-critics