Also, on that site was (not sure it's still accessible)this very insightful list of common excuses people give for their abusive pastors and church leaders:
- a) They aren’t like that all the time
- b) They are only like that with you
- c) They didn’t really mean it
- d) You don’t really understand them
- e) You are just being difficult
- f) You must have a problem with them (do you think?)
- g) That’s just the way they are
- h) They are just very passionate about their work